DISQUS

Kimberly · 1 year ago

Please pray for me as much as you can and with as many people as you can.My name is Kimberly, God came into my life almost 4 years ago, I started going to church 1 year ago, and I have recently changed churches in the last month because the other church gossiped and such and the people didn't seem to be too happy. I am 26 years old and am going through alot of self doubt. I would like to have more Christian friends, not people who say they are christians, but people who study Gods law and try to love others as much as possible like I am trying to do. It is not easy to find friends or people who believe in Christ like I do and like I am trying to do. I got married June 18, 2000 my marriage wasn't that good, for one I didn't have God or even care to read his words like I do now.For two, I was overjealous and thought my husband was always going to leave me because I did't treat him good enough, I thought that he would find a partner that would treat him better, I was guilty alot because I was mentaly, verbally, physically abusive.I never told my husband why I was mad, because I was ashamed of my jealousy and alot of my other feelings. My husband left me around March 11, 2004, he was in Virgina taking a class,he was in the army, I thought I heard a woman in the background, I didn't tell him why I was mad at him, I tried real hard to not be jealous, I even got to the point where I would talk bad about other women who I thought were beautiful, when I rented DVD's I would read the backs of them to make sure there were no pretty looking women or sex scenes that he would look at. I always felt like I was never good enough in bed and feared that he would find someone who was good enough for him. I guess you can say I had low self esteem. In 2001 I started cheating on him, with a man that I would have loved to have a loving relationship with but all he wanted to do was have sexual intercourse with me and leave, that made me feel even more terrible. My husband and I have 3 children together, he has those children with him and doesn't want me to see them because he says that I am crazy and selfish and not a good mother,that I don't know how to take care of children, that all I ever did was make my oldes son watch my younger daughters, all I cared about was sex and all kinds of other crazy stuff. I still want my husband back. I want him to forgive me and care to talk to me so that we can talk things over. He is currently with another woman, I pray that it is in Gods will for him to leave her and come back to me. I pray that I will stop beating myself up over everything and stop cutting myself down, it hurts my soul and I don't know how to stop. Pray so hard and so deeply that my Lord, Jesus Christ will make my husband Ryan his and make him mine, as well as make me, my husband Ryans and for the Lord to keep saving my soul and providing me with the faith that my husband will come back to me someday. I pray that someday is soon. Pray with me that it will be soon that my husband will return to me and want me back. Pray deeply on your knees that my husband Ryan will not marry the other woman that he is engadged to named Jessica, pray that he will leave her soon instead. The bible says let no man seperate what God has joined together and I believe that my husband and I are joined together, I believe it because, sometimes I just know what he is doing, and then I find out that his fiance is thinking the same thing, I sometimes see visions and they come true. I pray that I will have visions and dreams of things that will come in my life so that I may be excited to see Christ and all of his glorious works. I would also like you to pray for my family and me, for healings of mental illnesses, substance abuses, down syndrome,worry and stress problems physical&verbal&mental abuse problems, emotional problems, anxious problems, cancer,diabetes,high blood pressure,absess teeth, bipolar, depression,liquid feelings in the mind, scitzoprenia, hallucinations, all timers, not knowing how to raise children, not knowing how to respect elders, low self esteem,no confidence, no courage,no Holy Spirit, no Jesus, no bible reading, no watching good programs or listening to good music that will not harm the mind (because they don't know that they are hurting theirselves), shaming and guilting one another and making each other afraid of them and all sorts of problems like them matters,alcohol problems, hate problems, all of their salvations, patience&happiness&joy problems, relationship problems, lonliness, physical pains, to name a few: teeth problems,some wont go to the doctor to be treated, back and leg problems, knee problems, ear problems, head problems, eye problems, stomach problems, throat problems, not reading the bible problems, not believing in God problmes, troubles praying often enough, troubles believing what God is showing them right in front of them, achinnes of the soul and mind and body, troubles with hands and the rest of the body, I pray for the miracle of God, that Jesus would do for my families and everyone that I know what he did for me. I pray that I will have more peace and Holy Spirit in my soul. I pray for the gift of tongues and encouragement. I pray that I will remain drug free and cigarette free and caffeine free for the rest of my life. I pray that I will remain close to God for the rest of my life and never betray him. I pray that I will know how to love and praise God all day and all night long and that I will enjoy doing it. I pray that I will always pray in every situation and stress no more. For my soul to quit aching. For me to know how to care for my soul and love God and love myself in Christ, the christian way to accept others who are doing illegal things and cussing God and making fun of believers and such. Please also Pray hard and with as many people as you can, pass this around to the elders of your church, to the believers, to the prayer warriors, my brothers and sisters, I come to you needy for prayer. Pray for my happiness in this world (for all the bad things that I see disturb me terribly), pray that all the bad people who ever did not care about my Spiritual welfare-who loved to tell me no and make fun of my beliefs in God will no longer care to make fun of me or even be around me. I pray that I will attract believers. Lord, I know that you made an example in the world to the non believers and I have tried to be around them and share the Gospel and they hurt me something terribly. Lord I don't know what I am doing wrong. Now, I have decided that I need more Christian friends and then we as a team can win souls to Christ. May this special Christian friend be my husband? Lord, I need a Christian friend with the same goals of living to serve you and go to heaven soon. Lord, I ask again May this person be my husband? Lord, will you make him cry out to you like you did me and Lord when we get back together we can share our stories about what we have done over the years and how you saved us both. We can restore our marriage relationship real easy through you as well as lead our children to you. Lord, I am willing to be with him even though he is not a christian, will you give him the same thoughts as I have? Lord, I will stay living for you,like you have shown me. I will talk to my children about you and pray with them. I will be a Christian example for my family home. Lord, you said that the household of the believer will be saved, please Lord, even though my husband and children don't live with me please may they be my household. Lord, reveal to me what it is that I need to do to help you restore my marriage. Reveal to me anything that I need to learn before my husband comes back to me. Lord, could it be tomorrow or the next day? Lord, I have been praying for a while, sometimes I feel there is no hope, Lord restore the believeing heart in me. Show me how you want me to live around my family. Show me how to lead others to Christ. Show me how to be a Christian mother and wife. Lord, I know you are showing me and I praise you. Lord, alot of my time I spend worrying and feeling bad even though I have been reborn, I need more of you Lord, I need you to work in me even without me knowing it I need assurance that my husband will be comming home. Lord, I know that faith is believeing in the unseen and if that is what it takes to get my husband back please teach me how to be full of faith so that I can recieve my husband back. Lord, many people give me their opinions and try to make me think like they do. Which ones are right? Lord, you are right. Help me to not fall asleep reading so easily so that I can read your word. Make me want to read the Bible more and scriptures on the internet. Make me want to memorize verses and quote them in situations. Lord, I need you, I need so much more that I don't even know. So much more that will take too much space to name. Lord, this aggravation inside of me why is it there? Is it my medication.Lord the world has effect on me in many ways and it is tempting to me to follow their ways and when a loved one is around me or someone that I am trying to be cool around I may do a dance to nasty music, I know I will, deliever me from the world and make me not afraid to live for you and in those situations glorify you,make me do whatever it takes so that I will not get hurt by the world. Thank you for calling me out of the world. Lord, I have too much anger in me, where is it comming from, how do I give all my problems to you. Lord, I need your help in choosing good friends, only you know who is true Christians, Lord I need a friend that likes to talk about you and live for you all of the time because that is what I want to be. Lord, all the bad advice that I have unknowingly taken in erase from my memory. Show me how to be stronger so that I can glorify you. Teach me how to surrender my whole life over to you. Teach me what is good and bad in this world father. Lord, I need help from good christians. Good Christians who are reborn and want to live for God and talk about God all day pray for me, you and your familys please pray for me, I need prayer brothers and sisters. I am a child of God. I have so much to learn.Pray that I will know how to put on the armor of God and that I will know what it is so that the world will stop hurting me. My family all needs to be saved, Lord, teach me how to be around them. Lord. Lord my body has been going numb? Lord, I sometimes wonder if I am even saved. Even though I do have the Spirit, someone once told me well I think that those feelings are from the drugs and it tore me down Lord. Lord what do I do? Lord, I have been fighting that thought for 2 months or so. I thought the woman was a christian, I was basically miserable around her. Lord, how do I look at the situation? How will I know if someone is close to you? How do I stop being miserable? Am I making myself miserable? Lord, I dont know what to do in any situation. I am helpless. I have never been a reborn Child of God before. Thank you for making me your child. Set my paths Lord help me to learn and accept that you are not a mean God, that you are not like all of the other people in my life who were mean to me. Lord, make these mean thoughts and feelings go away. Lord, make me live for you and no one else. Lord, help me to know how to raise a family. Help my husband to know you and want you and be close to you, through his sister and her friends, my letters to him and the children telling them I love them, surround him with my brothers and sisters. Lord, he is my husband, Lord, he is a good man, Lord, he wont hurt me or the children. He is helpful around the hime, he would do anything that I ask him to do. He is a wonderful man and I believe that I love him and if I don't I want to because I feel we can make it together, one big happy family, Lord, I have troubles cleaning my home, help me to keep a really neat home that smells good. Take my fears away: fears of the dark, fears of the devil, fear of rejection, fear of people not liking me, fears of people breaking in my house, fear of not really being reborn, fear of ending up in a wheel chair without a sane mind, fear of people, fear of bad advice, fear of people laughing at me, fear of peoples response after I quote a verse or tell someone about God, fear of not knowing enough about God to help Sunday School or toddler class at preschool or speak to others about Christ, fear of someone hurting my body like beating me up, punching me or killing me, fears of someone setting me up to get into trouble with the law so that I will go prison, fears of someone setting me up to kill me and then using one of my poems (that can mean anything) to say that it is a suicide, fear of someone killing me and then getting by with it laughing, fear of using drugs again, fear of saying no to drugs, fear of going to someones house and they start passing around a meth pipe,fear of someone passing the meth pipe and what they will do to me or think about me when I say no. Paranoia, hullicinations, fear of not getting to see my children,fear of what my husband will say on the stand at divorce and custody cases, fear of divorce and child custody cases happening, fear that I wont get my husband back, fear of not getting one of my children back from the state, fear of the influences that are around me, fear of bad cops and judges and other government, fear because no one talks about God, fear of evil spirits, fear of what is really going on with my mind and body, fear of dying, fear of not being a good mother, fear of not having patience enough for my children or my marriage, fear that the wrong people will read this letter and hurt me, fear because my younger sister has been using my name and social security number to open accounts, fear that my other younger sisters and mother will rob me of my computer, fear of people climing in the window, fear of people climing in the window to rob me and having to kill me because I was home, fear of people telling lies in me to get me kicked out of my home or the programs that I go to, fear that my church will start gossiping about me like the last one did, fear of the law around here because the woman that I used to go to church with who I didn't feel treated me rights step son is sherrif-I am afriad that they are crooked and can hurt me or send me to jail or even set me up, fear of drug dealers and people who use drugs, fear of my husband not wanting me, fear of sending my husband messages over the internet to try to get to his heart because last time his fiance called me names and threatned to turn me into myspace, fear of bad people that are in authoritive positions taking me to jail, setting me up, harming me, fear of disagreeing with someone and all other evil things that can be thought of. Pray for my jelousy to go away and all other obstacles that are in between my husband and I . For me to stop telling my self, Im miserable, Im miserable when I get pains in upper area of chest. I am overwelmed with many burdens and grief. I need all goodness of Christ, I am a newly reborn Christian who doesn't know what is right and what is wrong anymore.I have alot of doubt and problems and they hurt my soul and I can feel it. For my finaces which are low and I owe so much I am burdend. Lord protect my computer,body and home in all ways.Lord reveal yourself in my life in all that I do and make my husband Ryan Allstun love you and me, because I know that you want me to have a christian husband and I want him.Amen

Glenn · 1 year ago

GODS HELP TODAY URGENT.